By this point, because of the extraordinary situation I was in – a life endangering conspiracy involving hospitals and persistently falsified medical records – I was recording all my medical visits, as is my right under ORS 165.540(5)(a). However, out of an abundance of caution, at first I didn’t record the providers conversations, only my own. By March, I changed that, and started recording both sides of the conversation. So in this first visit, you can’t hear Dr Burns’ questions, just my responses.
By about seven minutes in, it’s pretty clear that Dr Burns is less interested in determining whether or not I am telling a story that is evidence-based, which would be the crux of whether or not I have delusional disorder, and the whole reason I’m speaking with him, and more interested in working up some kind of psychological profile on me, thus the digging into my childhood, relationship with my parents, etc – all things that seem tangental to whether or not I have a set of fixed beliefs unamenable to change in light of conflicting evidence.
8:04 “Our family is being trafficked.” I know for certain there are financial mechanisms around this that amount to human trafficking. What I am less clear on is exactly how it works, though I know more now than I knew when I made the video. It appears that what people are selling are salacious and/or untrue stories and set-ups, as well as medical manipulations including pain and illness. Based on my observations, the amount of money involved in this trafficking system, and the things done for this money, are obscene.
Generally speaking, as of now, August 2022, I have a more refined understanding of what has been going on than I did in February 2021, though there are still important pieces missing or left vague. Some things are still very puzzling to me, like the exact role of my parents, and how this situation may have developed over time. So I’m not claiming that everything I say in this video is 100% correct. But I shouldn’t have to be 100% correct about everything all the time to not be considered delusional, especially considering how much I’ve been misdirected. I should only be expected to develop and modify my ideas appropriately based on appropriate evidence.
Honestly, it seems like the conflict here is more about control of ideas, speech, and expression. It’s not that the things I’m saying are impossible or not evidence based – it’s that I’m exposing things certain powerful entities don’t want exposed, and their response is to try and control my speech and behavior, and failing that, to discredit me with defamatory psychological diagnoses.
Shaun Burns Chart Notes
(additional commentary following)
Ultimately – and right now it’s hard for me to fathom why, considering everything else that was going on (Chris was sick, dying of cancer) – I ended up having six visits with Shaun Burns. Right now I feel that Dr Burns was not operating independently, that he had been instructed in how to conduct the sessions, and that his diagnosis was going to be what it was regardless of the evidence. But at the time, I guess I didn’t fully grasp that this is what is going on.
One thing worth mentioning are these descriptions of my affect. I see this description of “pressured speech” a lot – it showed up, I believe, in Dr Pollack’s notes and in Dr Rosenfeld’s notes as well as from this first session with Dr Burns. Pressured speech is not just talking fast or excitedly – more like frenziedly, without regard to body cues, etc, and according to Wikipedia, “is often associated with certain mental disorders, particularly mania and schizophrenia. It can be unrelenting, loud, and without pauses.” Dr Pollack’s 2014 note described my speech as simultaneously pressured and monotone, while Dr Burns described my speech as pressured, with a constricted affect. I have a hard time even imagine what this would sound like. Subsequent visit notes of Dr Burns don’t mention pressured speech, but he was aware that I had been reading the chart notes. There was originally a note from this first visit stating I’d refused to do a depression screening that he never offered to give me, which he fixed. To me, it looks like an effort to paint my described affect to match this pre-decided mental health diagnosis, and importantly, this same thing is going on with several different providers in different medical systems – in fact, it’s been going on at every medical system I’ve encountered in Portland. That means that either I’m incredibly crazy, or this is an incredibly big situation.
web page updated 21 August 2022